Sex Drive: What It Is + How to Increase It

Boosting your sex drive (libido) starts with understanding what affects it—then gently nourishing the mind, body, and relationships to invite desire back in. Low libido is common (especially for women!) and doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.

What Affects Your Sex Drive?

  • Hormones (estrogen, testosterone, progesterone, cortisol)
  • Mental health (stress, anxiety, depression, trauma)
  • Fatigue or burnout
  • Body image issues
  • Relationship disconnect or unspoken resentment
  • Medication side effects (e.g., antidepressants, birth control)
  • Lack of touch or sensual stimulation
  • Motherhood or major life shifts (postpartum, menopause)

How to Gently Increase Your Libido

1. Reconnect With Your Body (Without Pressure)

  • Daily touch: lotion, stretching, gentle massage
  • Move your body in ways that feel feminine, strong, or sensual (yoga, dance, walking with music)
  • Mirror time: stand naked or semi-clothed and just notice yourself without judgment

2. Prioritize Rest & Nervous System Reset

  • Libido needs energy reserves and low stress to function
  • Fatigue and high cortisol kill desire Try:
  • Magnesium before bed
  • Breathwork (inhale 4, exhale 6)
  • Boundaries: Reduce “overgiving” and say no more

3. Activate Your Sensual Side Desire often follows arousal—not the other way around. Sensual routines:

  • Wear something soft or silky, just for you
  • Burn candles or incense
  • Engage with erotic stories, music, or guided fantasy (e.g., Ferly or Quinn apps)
  • Self-touch without the goal of orgasm

4. Support Hormonal Health Naturally

  • Eat healthy fats (avocado, seeds, nuts, olive oil)
  • Balance blood sugar (avoid sugar crashes)
  • Try libido-supporting herbs:
  • Maca root
  • Ashwagandha
  • Shatavari
  • Tribulus terrestris Note: Always check with a practitioner before taking supplements.

5. Emotional & Relationship Check-In

  • Do you feel emotionally connected to your partner?
  • Are there unspoken resentments or feeling "touched out"?
  • Does foreplay feel rushed, or focused only on climax? Try:
  • Love languages check-in
  • Scheduled intimate time that’s not about sex—just closeness

6. Lube + Fantasy = Game Changers

  • Many women experience vaginal dryness due to hormones—lube is a pleasure tool, not a crutch.
  • Explore fantasies or desires in a safe space (even just writing them down)
  • Let desire be a slow burn—not a switch